Wednesday, July 16, 2008

CINCINNATI (Associated Press) - Senator John McCain addressed members of the NAACP this morning in an inspirational speech designed to contrast his candidacy with that of his African-American opponent. "Greetings, colored people!" McCain began...

No, actually, not really. But can you imagine the fallout?! He'd be finished! I've always thought that this component of black America, the NAACP, was indicative of a certain racist hypocrisy in the whole scene. I'm going to start the NAABWM, but you are not allowed to call me a balding white male -only I reserve that right. (Of course, there's no uncomfortable history of balding white men having been enslaved in this country, which may or may not have contributed to my current social condition, so I guess it's not exactly a parallel. ...but how dare you call me a BALDING... WHITE... MALE!)

The truth is many balding white males are wealthy and well-adjusted (IT'S NOT FAIR!) and have no need for advancement, so I doubt I could get any members and fashion a group of any political influence. How about the National Association for the Advancement of Hairy Legged Aluminum Workers (NAHLAW)? How about the National Association for the Advancement of Skinny Beer Swillers (NAASBS)? I'm addressing all members in the mirror shortly.

In other, I swear totally unrelated, news... this incident (pointed out by Lileks) I found strangely fascinating. Then it was blogged by someone who saw the exchange happen (here). And then there's the flickr page. And then this site, The Consumerist, fleshes out the story, at which point I found myself suddenly siding with the coffee shop. Not convinced? Well, did you read the backstory at Starbucks Gossip? What is the whole wide world coming to? But, wow, thank goodness we have the technology to document it!

The "ghetto latte". I've never ordered one. I hope it never comes to that for me. I've made them at home unwittingly, and found them to be refreshing without any undue ascorbic aftertaste. My Jewish wife was not offended. You see, the word "ghetto" actually refers to the Venetian Ghetto in Venice where the Jews were forced to live, and "ghetto" actually means "foundry" in Italian, in reference to the foundry on the same island as the area of Jewish confinement. A "foundry" is a place for metal workers. I happen to be a coffee-loving, metal worker who has a Jewish wife and, somehow, the term "ghetto latte" does not offend me. I am also white, male, and balding -like John McCain!

Well, okay, sorry if I offended anyone, here. I'm a pretty sensitive and insecure guy, but hey, I'm trying to get over it. Political Correctness defends the thin-skinned adult-babies of the world, and to them I say, show a little backbone, willya?

Case in point.