Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Remember when I posted about the robot fish? And there was also the robot military dogs? Now: robot snakes. I suppose it was only a matter of time. Call me when they come up with robot ants, designed to infiltrate and subdue colonies of real ants.

Not that we have a problem with ants. Aaron has been good and reliable, for us. Last month's silverfish eradication seems to have been a success, but there are always ants. Aaron takes care of them out back near the garden, but they just return from the neighbor's land in a long black line that stretches from here to beneath the fence to forever and away, all the way back to that distant and yet undiscovered endless tap source deep underground. I imagine it as some weird Middle-Earth technology, coagulating the elements of Subterranea and forever dripping out ANTS, ad infinitum. This machine can never be destroyed. Also, I think the machine is worshipped by many of the ants.

Ants are currently being celebrated in the Smithsonian, although one suspects that they couldn't get rid of them either and just decided to embrace the concept. Same for Monty Python, who dedicated an entire Flying Circus episode to the unstoppable critters. Well , if you can't beat 'em, join 'em! (The ants, I mean.) But sometimes I feel it is the ants who are trying to eliminate us. Join us.

Speaking of insufferable annoyances bent on eliminating us... We called a customer yesterday to happily inform them that their patio cover materials were in and that we would be building it next week. They said, "Oh! That cancellation letter we sent got returned to us! And we sent it certified mail!" -but no friendly call or anything so that we could suspend the manufacturing order. Now we're sitting on thousands of dollars of aluminum material, and pissed about it. We have a signed contract! We could sue, but I don't think we're the suing type. I prefer to shame and embarrass, hence: the name is "Gentry" and they live in Lake Elsinore. Perhaps tomorrow I will post the phone number and address. Perhaps I will sign them up for every junk contractor ad at the next Home Show. Perhaps I will do that for the rest of my life. In any case, their email address is now toast, and we're set back another couple grand. (And here I thought we were getting caught up.) Anyway, when you wrong a family business, you are actually hurting the family. I see no reason to be polite about it. But it happens now and then. We've weathered those seas before, and we'll weather them now.

In the meantime, anyone need a nice 11' x 21' Alumawood patio cover (white, w/mitered endcuts)?

Times are tough, I guess. You can tell things are getting tough when legal contracts are dishonored and ants... something to do with ants... Oh, hell. I was going to tie it all together but everyone is SCREAMING THEIR HEADS OFF AROUND HERE and who can blame them?